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Summer week 40

Well i am now 2 days overdue!!
This part feels like it is passing by so slowly. I saw the midwife on Monday and she told me that they will only allow me to go 2 weeks over my due date. I have to go back and see her on monday (if i haven't had the baby yet) and they will do a membrane sweep if i want one. This is simply running a finger along the neck of the cervix to try and stimulate the cells into starting labour but its not garunteed to start things off although it has a good rate of success.
So now i feel like a ticking timebomb. I am too scared to leave the house as i don't think i could face the humiliation of my waters breaking in public. I did not think it was possible to feel any more uncomfortable than i had been up till now but i was sooooo wrong. I keep having hot flushes and am generally sweating from my body overheating, with every move she makes it is actually bordering on painful and she is so far down. Also i am practically weeing every 20 minutes which isn't great when i am struggling to find the energy to climb the stairs.
On a positive note i think all of these complaints are a good thing as i have not worried at all about the birth. I am too busy wishing labour would start to even comprehend the pain of whats about to happen.
I really thought it was going to start last night as i had unusual pains that felt like contracting pains but after a very restless night it came to nothing. The midwife suggested two things to help bring on labour (but did say that nothing scientifically will work and she will arrive when she is good and ready). The first thing is fresh pinapple which unfortunately i hate. The second thing is oral sex... honestly. Unfotunately for all the women out there she meant oral sex for him!!!! Confused... so was i! aparently there is something in semen which softens the neck of the womb and it works best if it is ingested oraly. Please note that i neglected to pass this information onto my husband - why the hell should he get any treats, its his fault i am in this situation!! So i have been forcefeeding myself pinapple which has so far not worked.
Before you all start giving me your words of wisdom don't bother. I have heard them all - hot curry, sex, walking, cycling, etc etc. As the midwife said she will come when she is good and ready.
Strangely i have been feeling particularly crappy today and have had extreme lower back pains (not too disimilar to period pains) which i have heard is a symptom of early labour. I have a gut feeling about tonight but don't really want to tempt fate so i will say no more.
My only other thing of note is that i am very tempted to turn off my phone. I must get about 10 messages a day asking if i have had it yet!!! Believe me when i say i will let you know. If you are a friend and i have your mobile number i will be texting everyone, i will post a bulletin on myspace and will update my status on my facebook page. Point is, there is no need to ask every day as i will be sure to let you know. If you want to contact me then please do feel free as i am bored stupid but feel free to talk to me about anything else!! Its hard enough to get through each day wondering every second if this is the time without other people constantly reminding you that you are still waiting.
... I should also point out that with every day overdue i go i am getting very grouchy. Sorry. I feel most sorry for my husband as he is definately getting the crappy end of it but i hope he understands.
Anyway best go - got lots of daytime TV to get back to.
Mum to be
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