Kat-out-of-the-bag

As I enter my 30th week I am really starting to feel it. The babies movements are becoming quite intense and if I look hard enough I can almost figure out which body part is pushing out (usually feet or elbows). My ankles have still not started swelling up badly but they really do hurt at the end of the day. The heartburn is back too with avengance. There are so many ailments that I can't even be bothered to list them. The final physical problem is the ever increasing bump which seems to grow every day. I am really struggling now to find any clothes baggy enough and as for walking well... it is well and truly a waddle now. Work is really difficult as on top of the tiredness and lack of concentration I am simply losing my focus and find myself drifting off in my own thoughts at my desk making baby plans, thinking about what I still need to buy, what I should be packing in my hospital bag and generally counting down the days till I leave. This has all been made so much ...

Wow - the response I had after last weeks post was very overwhelming and unexpected. I think above all it hit a familiar note with many people and some friends were very surprised about how I had kept my feelings hidden (comes from years of practise). Anyhow this week things are looking much brighter. I started to feel a bit brighter once I had acknowledged that my depression was creeping back in. Quite often its that first, and difficult step, that is the biggest hurdle. I had a midwife appointment booked in last Friday and had every intention of speak to her about the depression and perhaps even going back onto the medication. My husband came with me for moral support (and I suspect to ensure I didn't chicken out). I found it easier than I had thought to come out with it and contrary to the way I suspected her to react she was incredibly supportive and didn't make me feel like I was just being a drama queen. She agreed that the symptoms sounded as though it was creeping bac...

Well Christmas and New Year were eventful and not in a good way. I had, what was quite possibly, the worst Christmas ever for reasons I will detail in this blog. It began around the beginning of December. My 4 year old daughter seems to have become possessed. She started playing up and has gotten naughtier by the day. It started with her saying no to everything and refusing to do anything we tell her such as getting dressed, eating her dinner or simply not answering back to us. This progressed and she started being a smart arse with us saying things like "I don't have to do that if I don't want to" and "you can't tell me what to do". She has basically turned into a stroppy teenager overnight. We are yet to find a punishment that works on her, she just seems to be completely emotionless toward anything we implement. At the moment she has had most of her Christmas presents confiscated and has to earn them back through good behaviour but she doesn't s...